My woes

Sometimes, I just felt that I am not needed anymore. No matter how much I have tried, how many opinions I had gave, I was ignored. Ignored. Why am I ignored? Am I just someone who blabbers things that are useless? Or is it that I hold no respect at all? Just some outsider, I guess. So why should I work hard in the first place? There was no attention given to me, but only to themselves. Never had they took my priorities into consideration and only theirs. WHY? Is it that difficult to listen to others for once? Or is is that they are extreme ego-ist? Then again, I think it is that I am just the orphan in the family. Asked to do things when needed, not allowed to protest or raise your own thoughts at all.

"Don't care them," that's what I felt the most anger about. It might not mean anything to them, but it meant something to me. Why did they come in the first place? Why did we spent our pratice time just to welcome them? Sure, give the orphans a warm welcome. Then? We threw them away 7 days after. Let them sit on a separated dining table from the family. Why? Aren't they accepted into the big family anymore? Or are they just back-up tools for those elderly who are going to move on soon?

Seriously, if this goes on, I think I don't want to be a part of the family anymore. Cause it sucks. Everyone's changing. Not the people I know anymore, I thought I knew them well. But in reality, I was so distant. So distant... Maybe I shouldn't let myself be engulfed in this "friendship" thing as quickly anymore. I am just a nobody to them. I was a fool. And shall not be one anymore. I would stand firm with my decisions and let my messages be sent across. No matter how far they are, I will shout, scream- whatever it takes to let them hear. If I couldn't. I have failed. And i would leave the family.

2 points? It's easily acheivable when I take away the time I had with the family for studying purposes. Times with the family are rather time-consuming. So I still stand a chance without it. Though I had to thank someone for keeping my sanity in check, who listened to me whenever I felt wronged or vice-versa. A great friend to have. Thanks so much.